The Monogamous Hotwife

Hey, everyone! Long time no blogging. I hope you are all well and happy.

Every now and then I'll get an e-mail asking me for advice, usually of a sexual nature. Usually it's a woman wondering how she can turn her man on, rekindle the passion or be that sex goddess she knows she can be. I suppose it comes with the blog. Well, here's a little secret: I am no expert - at all. I have no better insight into men than your average gal. Sometimes, I feel like I have less than average. That happens at least once a day (twice a day during football season).

I'm also not the sexy, sultry type. I'm practically flat-chested, my hips aren't that wide and every now and then I almost fall flat on my face when I'm in heels. When I see a lady with one of those hour glass figures I think, 'There's a WOMAN' and I'm just a silly girl. I'm just not the type that can wrap a man around her finger. To sum up, consider this advice from a non-expert.

Some e-mails specifically ask about being a hotwife, mostly from women that doubt they could go through with it, despite being curious about the lifestyle. So, I thought, hey, why not write a post about how to be a hot wife, but not a Hotwife? Be that super-slut and monogamous. I've written this stuff before but maybe not in one place. Take it for what it's worth. Just a few thoughts and idea based upon some observations. It might not be for everyone or anyone. You might know all this already and it's useless. Or, maybe something here will spark an idea or two. Please add any thoughts or ideas. I'd love to hear them.

First, the easy stuff:

1) Visual Cues - Most men respond strongly to visual cues, much more so than we do. That's just a fact of life. You may as well use it. If you don't have any lingerie, remedy that situation. And I don't mean a silky, comfy nightie. I mean some garters, a corset a merry widow. If it takes more than five minutes to put on, we're on the right track.

If you're like me, you don't use a lot of makeup on a day to day basis. Go heavy on the war paint some night, especially around the eyes. I'm not saying put it on with a putty knife but going a bit heavy on the eye liner can get your guy's attention.

Walking in the bedroom in a pair of heels can wake up the sleepiest guy. You have a pair in your closet, put them on. You may want to keep them on when the action starts or you may not. I think I almost impaled Steve one night, but you may be more coordinated than I am.

When you change your hairstyle you can really change your look. Men crave variety, so try a new look. And I don't mean one of those practical Mom looks. When I put a blond streak in my hair one time, Steve loved it.

2) Verbal - I felt uncomfortable the first few times I used "naughty talk." It made me self-conscious, like I was playing a role and not doing a very good job. Well, if you're man is like mine, he won't even notice. I mean really, I have a guy that can appreciate great cinema but if he had his choice would watch grade B zombie flicks. So, when you play the part of the wanton woman, don't expect a critique. Toss in a "fuck me," from time to time. Or better yet, "fuck me from behind" (see my section on Positions in my next post). "God, your cock is big," is a nice one too.* Have a few lines handy. No, we're not porn stars but if your man watches some porn, he likes it and I bet he likes the dirty talk. There's nothing wrong with playing the part from time to time.

3) Fantasy Talk - If you are like us, there's a lot of talking going on in the bedroom. Sometimes we like to talk about our fantasies. I'll talk about what Steve likes and he'll talk about what I like. It's very different. While I'm telling him about how I'd love to have him watch while I get gang banged, he's telling me about our romantic night on a tropical island. But, it's fun as long as you both let go and realize its fantasy.

Ask your guy if he ever fantasizes about having another woman in bed. Go with it. Tell him how you'd like to join in. It may be the furthest thing from your idea of a good time but so what? Half the men I know unabashedly admit they like the "girl-girl" thing. I'm betting a good majority of the remainder like it as well. Plus, if you plant the seed that you may just be a little bi-curious, it will create a little sexual mystery about you.

Of course, it is important to be very non-judgmental** in all of this. You can't ask him to verbalize a fantasy and then obsess about it afterwards. "Why does he want to do a threesome? Aren't I enough?" Relax, it's a fantasy. You are enough or he wouldn't be with you. But he probably already has that fantasy anyway, whether he verbalizes it or not, so where's that get you. You may as well go with it.

This is getting long so I'll do a two-parter. Next, we'll get down to the nitty-gritty.

* "God you're big," should only be used with men who are slightly below average in size and up. If the guy is really small, it'll just sound stupid.

** Being non-judgmental has its limits. I pride myself on taking a live-and-let-live attitude but really. If he starts to fantasize about animals, kids, Rosie O'Donnell or Newt Gingrich you may want to schedule an appointment for him.

Happy New Year

It has been a few months so Happy New Year to all that may still read us.

We had some more more Hot Wife fun last weekend. We usually do something wild for New Years but we actually laid low for the Holiday. Stayed in, watched a few flicks and chilled out. We made up for it last weekend. This time we went out and met up with some people. Some we knew, like our good friend Cooper, some were friends of friends that we didn't know. We went to a club and the drinks and fun flowed nicely.

My beautiful bride wore this kick-ass outfit: A short, tight dress that had more than a few guys staring at her. Very hot, especially with the heels and anklet. She thought she looked too slutty but wore it because I said I like it way too much for her to change.

During the course of the night some of the patrons acted like children. This happens sometimes and it makes me laugh. One guy got pissed off when another kept on checking out his girl. Words were exchanged and it almost came to blows. These were not people with us, just fellow patrons. I find it funny because I love it when guys check out Piper and more than a few did that night. I saw two particular guys who could barely take their eyes off her and her cute, little ass. It was hot.

It was also funny because at the same time the two jerks began exchanging words, Piper was dancing with Cooper and his friend, Ryan. She was between the two of them and Cooper would, from time to time, run his hands over her hips and down to her ass. Ryan grabbed a feel as well but he was much more restrained. He would only lower his hand just below the small of her back, almost touch her ass, but not quite. He was taken with her though.

I'm fascinated the way some men get crazy when another man admires his lady. Really? Is it that big a deal? I'm not talking about lengthy, uncomfortable, stalkerish behavior. I'm talking about a glance or two, almost involuntary for many men, when an attractive woman walks by.

I'm not suggesting every man should get off by sharing his wife or girlfriend with other men, like I do. I'm just wondering why the craziness when your woman gets an appreciative glance or two from strangers?

Anyway, we partied for a few hours and Piper danced, flirted and enjoyed the attention of both Cooper and Ryan. When she came to sit next to me I asked her if she liked Ryan. I knew he was her 'type.' Kind of rugged, not a pretty guy, with a few extra pounds. I should know. I used to be her 'type.' Then, I lost 15 pounds when my doctor said I was 10 pounds overweight.

She thought he was cute and nice. I suggested we invent them back to the house. She told me to get her another drink and "we'll see."

It was getting late so I told Cooper we'd be leaving. He looked disappointed but then I invited him back to the house. I said Ryan could come along as well. We drove back and I was excited. They thought of Piper fucking a new guy drove me crazy.

We got to our house and had a nightcap. We put on some music and turned down the lights. Piper and Cooper started slow dancing while Ryan and I had some wine. He turned out to be a cool guy. A big hockey fan like yours truly.

When I looked up, Piper and Cooper were dancing and kissing. He had his hands on her ass and she was rubbing his cock. I smiled. Ryan was somewhat shocked and looked at me.

"We swing," was all I could say.

Piper took Cooper by the hand and they went to the guest room. I poured some more wine for Ryan and I and waited a few minutes. When I poked my head in the bedroom, Piper was on her knees, blowing Cooper. He had a big smile on his face and held up his wine glass to me.

"Much obliged," he said.

"Any time."

Ryan and I drank some more while we listened to Piper and Cooper. I knew Ryan was excited when we heard Piper: "Fuck me. Fuck me. God you're so big...."

I told him to go check her out. He looked embarrassed but couldn't help himself. When he didn't come back I wandered down the hall and so him in the doorway, watching.

Piper was on her hands and knees, getting it from behind.

"Can Ryan be next," I asked.

Piper looked up and nodded. She was too distracted to speak but I took that as a green light.

Ryan and I waited patiently until Cooper came out of the bedroom. I brought Ryan to my beautiful bride. She was on the bed, naked except for those great high heels. When Ryan walked in, she smiled and motioned him over to the bed. I had to go hunt down a condom. Cooper has certain privileges based on a longstanding relationship that Ryan hasn't earned.

I finally found one and got back to see Ryan with his cock in Piper's mouth. I handed him the condom and left them alone.

They were busy for a long time. Cooper and I watched Zombie Land while Ryan and Piper fucked. He must have really given it to her good because at one point it sounded like he was killing her. The screams were disturbing. I finally went to check it out. Ryan was on top of Piper, her head was slamming into the headboard and her hot high heels were high in the air. Then she came like a wild cat. I understood the screams when Ryan pulled out of her. The boy is huge. Bigger than Luke and that's saying something. The dude was thick and long.

Piper later said that when he came the condom was loaded with cum.

They boys crashed with us for the night. When I went to bed, Piper was sound asleep and didn't wake up until late the next morning. Ryan and Cooper had left by then but she seemed interested in seeing Ryan again. It's always cool to add a good guy to her list. Compared to last year, she hasn't been with many men at all. Just a few old friends here and there. I'd love to pick up the pace a bit and add some more charms to her anklet.