Sexy Things

The other day a girlfriend and I were chatting about what we find sexy in the male of the species. I thought I'd share.

1. Sense of Humor

This is a must for me. I always think that funny people are smart people. Besides, I like a man that can entertain me and make me laugh. I'm old-fashioned that way. I can't imagine spending a significant amount of time with one of those overly serious men who don't get sarcasm, satire or appreciate the absurdities of life.

2. Self Confidence

Isn't there something sexy about a self-confident man? I like the take charge type. I suppose, in a away, it is a sign that he can take care of me and will take care of me. The self confidence can't spill over into arrogance and I find a know-it-all hopelessly dull. Knowing what you want and knowing how to get it is one thing. Self confidence that lacks the know how to back it up just makes you look like an idiot.

3. Kindness

It's not just for chicks anymore. A man who has the ability and desire to do kind things is a gem. It keeps that self confidence from spilling over into arrogance and shows me it's not all about him. Quoting Ayn Rand is decidedly not sexy and won't get me under the covers.

4. Guy Stuff

Yes, I like a guy who likes guy stuff. There's something comforting about knowing that your man would rather be playing hockey or baseball with the guys than sitting at home crocheting. If he rolls his eyes at the Lifetime Movie I'm watching, so much the better.

There's few things more sexy than when Steve comes home after a game or a run and is soaked with sweat. Of course, he better hop in the shower right after he comes home, but it's still sexy.

5. Broad Shoulders and Muscular Arms

Two of each, of course. 'Nuff said.

A Few Links

Time for some linkage.

We'd like to thank two blogs that have linked to Babylon Visited.

First, we have Dew's Dates, a husband's blog about his Hot Wife. A man after Steve's heart.

Next, is Naughty Love Adventure. This is a new Husband/Wife blog.

Both blogs look promising. We want to thank them for the link and urge our own readers to give them a try. It's tough getting readers in the blogverse so we hope to send some their way.

And some very goods news from Alicia! Alicia from Alicia Night Orchid (link over on the right) has a story in the upcoming Erotic Anthology: "Swing! Adventures in Swinging by Today's Top Erotic Writers."

Congratulations, Alicia. Alicia is an excellent Erotic writer. One I really enjoy and recommend. I don't make recommendations lightly, especially fiction recommendations and more especially, Erotic fiction recommendations. Most Erotic Fiction reads like viagra-induced fan fiction. Alicia's the real deal.

Alicia has offered to send me an advanced copy for review and I might take her up on the offer. I've never done a review. It could be a challenge.

Finally, VSK Witness write in response to my last post about giving your man some time when he gets home from work:

I understand my wife only wants to make things better, but I lack the ability to change contexts as quick as she. You females have secret little switches in your witchy minds, don't you?

No, there's no magic. Nothing witchy going on. It's just......wait I have to go. My cauldron is bubbling over.

The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands

A reader wrote us with a request. Now, on rare occasions we receive an e-mail that bristles with demands: Write about this! Write about that! Personally, I find that rude. This particular e-mail was very respectful. The writer wanted a glimpse at the intimacy of marriage.

I thought about that for sometime. Our marriage is not yet six months old. I hope I can write a similar post when we are going on six years, not six months.

I am very happy with all aspects of our marriage, except for the laundry. Do men suddenly forget how to use a washer after they're married or did they not use one when single? Anyway, aside for one or two minor complaints, I'm more in love with Steve today than I was six months ago. I especially love the intimacy we share. I've found that I not only love him, which I find to be a simple, raw emotion, I 'like' him. Isn't 'like' much more complex than love.

By 'like', I mean that I want to spend my time with him. I want him around. I want to see him everyday, go to sleep next to him, wake up next to him. One of my greatest fears was the idea that your life's greatest passion may not be your life's greatest love.

He brings his work home with him. Not physically, but mentally. Steve is now fairly high-up in a corporate position. Not a good place to be right now. That's my one major complaint and it's not really a complaint. It's hard to complain when your main is hard-working and dedicated to his job. I wish, for his sake, he could leave office crap at the office.

Of course, I do my best to relieve his stress. I let him go into his 'cave' when he gets home. I have found that if you don't interrogate your man about his day when he first walks through the door, they will open up in their own time. They just need some downtime. An impromptu hand job also helps.

Maybe this will be a first in a series, "The Proper Care and Feeding of a Husband." I'd love to hear from some women who've been at this marriage thing longer than me.

Now, I'm off to enjoy what promises to be a beautiful Spring day. Have a terrific weekend.

Q & A

Wow, this might be the longest stretch between posts. We've been very busy with a bunch of other things but hope to post on a more regular basis in the near future.

VSK Witness from Vanilla Sex Kitten left an interesting question on our last post. I'll address a portion of that because I do find it a fascinating aspect of swinging. That is, how men handle nudity.

In my experience men handle the two girls - one guy thing fine. Why wouldn't they? Men really don't dwell on their bodily imperfections. This works out quite well because women don't generally idealize the male form. There's so much more that goes into our relationships, non-visual stimuli, that a few extra pounds, a receding hairline etc, can go unnoticed.

On the other hand, women are extremely self-conscious about their bodies but, at the same time, seem much more comfortable being naked in front of other women (who can be much more critical than men any day of the week). I find that very interesting.

Even back in high school, my friends and I wouldn't think twice about dressing or undressing in front of one another.

Now for the fun part. A two guys- one girl - threesome. Ah, yes, the dread of seeing another naked man and being seen naked by another man. Is another naked male kryptonite to the average male? This could explain why we never see Clark and Lois in a threesome.

So, the whole MFM thing has to be handled gently. We've had a few guys balk at the notion, a few that became too uncomfortable and a few that needed to be brought along gradually. A few drinks and a dark room can take the edge off.

Thankfully, our circle of friends are, for the most part, veteran swingers. Still, despite having been with.....say Steve and Luke, on numerous occasions, they do their utmost not to even touch one another by accident. Very funny stuff. So different than an FMF, even when the women do not engage in actual sex with one another. There's still a lot of touching and sharing. We must lack the kryptonite gene.

Have a great weekend.